| | Love is a wonderful, spirit-enhancing, and soul-uplifting thing.
The sad fact is, many people will never, ever
experience that. What they do receive, since when they were children, is a kind of love that is often
manipulative, controlling, domineering... or worse, twisted. But
since people, as children, love their parents naturally, even the ones that are
cruel and heartless - often they grow up to think that a punch in the
face from a jealous boyfriend is a prove of "he loves me."
One of the most crucial messages carried in Love, to me, is self-love. It took me years to understand this - but
learning to love one's self is still something that I cannot confidently say to have achieved so.
On the contrary we're often taught from an early age how to do the exact opposite, like we're too
thin, too fat, too short, too poor, the wrong place, the wrong time - you name it,
we're wrong.
And so we spend the rest of our lives looking for someone to "love" us.
To make up for the loss inside... because we hope that our desperate
longing for self-approval will be cured.
This is what I think where the dark side of Love comes in. Couples are chained to the Devil (or Darkness, or anything depending on your own spirituality) because they are
totally codependent on each other for self-esteem: instead of
feeling whole and complete, they have to find their "Another" to make them
feel total. Or becoming each other's "shadow". This is what often passes for love.
That's why as humans we are so prone to get caught in cycles of
recurring and damaging relationships - we are trying to heal those "false
nurturings" we received when we were young. Until one can honestly learn what love is, the same sequence will go through over and over again. |
| | Posted 12/15/2007 4:48 AM - 61 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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